6 Comments

  1. Making Friends in Germany :: Monkeys and Mountains
    May 12, 2012 @ 7:46 pm

    […] you have any tips on making friends, please share them below.  Also check out Language of Friendship by Grounded Traveler, another expat living in GermanyFor more tips see Seven Tips for Making New […]

  2. Making Friends in Germany | Expat in Germany
    January 14, 2011 @ 8:03 pm

    […] you have any tips on making friends, please share them below.  Also check out Language of Friendship by Grounded Traveler, another expat living in GermanyFor more tips see Seven Tips for Making New […]

  3. Andrew
    August 31, 2010 @ 6:19 am

    That is really interesting about the Swedish culture. Being an outsider with that leverage is one of the things that I love about the expat life.
    I love Vienna. (See latest Phototour post). I don’t remember them being so rude. Actually less standoffish than most Germans. I spent an hour talking to an old woman in a Cafe once about her life, just cause I randomly sat next to her. But then maybe you are right about the language bit, as I already knew German.

  4. Andrew
    August 31, 2010 @ 6:16 am

    That is such an annoying feeling to be told to just speak english. It feels like an insult to all the work we put in to learn. At that point, I usually take a deep breath and insist on speaking anything but english for a while.

  5. Kate
    August 29, 2010 @ 9:23 am

    I totally agree with you when you say, “Language makes making friends easier. It affects how open we are seen and how easy we are to approach.” I lived in Vienna for six months, and for the first two and a half, I was convinced that the Viennese were generally unfriendly, cold, and unwelcoming. In that third month, I started learning German well enough to start speaking a little, and my entire life there changed. People became so much friendlier even when I was butchering their language, just because I was trying. The little everyday interactions that can make or break your opinion of the people around you–in grocery stores, standing in line, trying to navigate public transportation–became so much easier and people became so much more accommodating when I tried to string together enough words to get my point across.

    Another thing about “grammar effects” and the way people are raised–I live in Sweden now, and it’s a fundamental part of politeness in Sweden not to be too nosy. If you start a conversation or open a line of inquiry, that’s fine, and they’ll engage with you, but I’ve met a lot of Swedish people who are hesitant to broach the silence and ask a leading question. Not always, but often… so it’s a good thing for travelers to remember to be that “open and interesting” person. That outsider status can be leverage to start conversations, ask questions, make mistakes, and try again!

    Great post. Thanks!

    – Kate from http://www.transatlanticsketches.com

  6. Shane
    August 28, 2010 @ 7:19 pm

    I understand your comments about people wanting to practice their English. My Turkish is appalling, despite living here for almost four years, in part because of this (and partly because it is hard and I am lazy and rubbish). When attempting my feeble linguistic skills I have actually been told ‘why don’t you speak English?’ Bah.